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by Gustavo Aviles (Author), Keith Grachow (Artist), Andrew Gough (Foreword by)
Discover the future history of Jesus Christ based on conjecture, history, the Gnostic gospels, conspiracy, and the assumption that ancient astronauts from the heavens are real.
Enter the journey where Zombie Jesus and his followers are alien beings from the heavens, his loving union with Mary Magdalene yielded children, time portals access all of time and existence, Nazis accomplished their secret construction of a UFO, the Vatican is run by vampires and reptilians, the Pope is a key nemesis of Zombie Jesus, Mary Magdalene is an equal to Jesus and a leader to his crew of travelers, the Christ was conceived through sex, and his father was a Roman soldier by the name of Pantera.
Zombie Jesus Vampire Hunter is awakened by John the Baptist who has also risen from the dead. They must find their traveling companions--Mary Magdalene, Judas Iscariot, Sarah the Saint Nun, and his other crew members--who have been scattered through time and space on Earth. They must beat the clock to reunite and find the Holy Grail that will summon the ships that will evacuate them from the face of this planet. In the way stands a secretive group of Nazis, who have harnessed the power of time-traveling UFOs, and the evil empire reptilian cabal in Vatican City. Zombie Jesus Vampire Hunter is about everything, everyone you know, it's a story of vengeance, love, and hate, but mostly it's a story about you.
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Shipping information
- Free Shipping* on all orders over $300 USD to most countries* Estimated delivery: 2-5 business days Mon-Sat to U.S., CA, EU etc.
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- Store 7994 Shipping policy
- Global delivery in 3–9 business days (location dependent).
- Free Worldwide Shipping $300+. International duties & VAT are calculated by destination country and may be collected upon delivery. UK orders are subject to 20% import VAT upon delivery.
Our innovation isn’t just in the brands we carry — it’s in the way we connect them. From our automation engine that keeps collections globally updated to our commitment to authenticity-first presentation, STORE 7994 exists where timeless design meets modern precision.
Every product we offer is:
Elevated · Intentional · Exclusive · Authentic
STORE 7994 is an authorized reseller of luxury fashion houses. Certificates and proof of authenticity are available to brand owners and partners upon request.
Returns & Refunds
We want you to shop with confidence at STORE 7994. If your purchase does not meet expectations, eligible items may be returned under the conditions below.
Return Eligibility
Items must be unused, unworn, and in original condition with all tags, packaging, and accessories included. Items showing any signs of wear or damage will not be accepted.
Return Window
Return requests must be made within 14 days of delivery.
Return Shipping
Customers are responsible for return shipping costs unless the item is defective, damaged, or incorrect.
Luxury Items
Items valued over $1,000 may be subject to a 7% restocking fee upon approved return.
Non-Returnable Items
For hygiene and product integrity reasons, the following items are final sale once opened or used:
• Underwear
• Fragrances
• Any worn or used items
Made-to-Order Items
Custom-designed products, including STORE 7994 hoodies, are made exclusively for each customer and are final sale. These items are not eligible for return or exchange unless defective or incorrect.
If you receive a defective or incorrect item, please contact us and we will make it right.
International Shipping & Duties
Many of our products ship directly from trusted international partners. Any applicable customs duties or import taxes are calculated at checkout and are non-refundable, even if the item is returned.
Returns & Associated Fees
All approved returns are subject to a $24 return processing fee. For international orders, duties, taxes, and return fees will be deducted from the original payment.
Shipping Policy
Complimentary shipping is offered on orders over $300. Orders below this threshold are subject to standard shipping rates at checkout.
