✔ 100% Money-Back Guarantee on Eligible Items
✔ Prices Displayed in Your Local Currency
✔ Final Price = No Surprise Import Fees
✔ Complimentary Insured Worldwide Shipping on Qualifying Orders
✔ Select Collector & Specialty Pieces May Require Secured Delivery Handling
by J. Christopher Eigel (Author)
Anyone from baby boomers to millennials who appreciates sarcasm will laugh out loud at the stories and often relatable life experiences of Eigel, as they are representative of American life.
This is the first book in the ToiletureTM Series. Toileture is a term Eigel has coined that defines the stories as: Literature in short form that can be read during one "sitting".
These anecdotes and stories are not moderated by political correctness. So, enjoy and take no offense, for certainly none is intended. As Mark Twain famously opined, "Life is short, break the rules. Forgive quickly, kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably. And never regret anything that makes you smile."
faint] Praise for THE LIGHTER SIDE OF LIFE
"This book was not reviewed nor read by JEFF FOXWORTHY. He probably would not have liked it."
--Anonymous
"Eigel dishonors the legacy of Star Trek and tarnishes the iconic uniform of a Starship Captain."
--What WILLIAM SHATNER likely would say, had he seen the Author photo
"I love these stories, they are so well crafted. I don't like the drinking parts though; why do you have to tell those parts?"
--SUZANNE, Eigel's Mother
"I haven't read these yet... I lived them, why do I have to read them?"
--MAUREEN, Eigel's Wife
Eigel grew up loving the likes of Lewis Grizzard and Paul Harvey and having a passion for the written word. Starting in 1996, he began writing an annual Christmas letter to be the antithesis of the typical letters. Self-deprecating humor and sarcasm were the impetus of his stories: real, embellished, or made up out of whole cloth. Those and many more are now compiled in this first book of Toileture.
In addition to this book, he has written a biographical novella about his Father-in-law's experiences up to and through WWII, including the remarkable reuniting of four separated brothers following the Battle of the Bulge titled: 18 Hours in Li ge--a Soldier's Story.
- In stock, ready to ship
- ✔ Authenticity Guaranteed — Verified Designer Goods
- ✔ Sourced from Authorized European/U.S. Luxury Distributors
- ✔ Secure Checkout — SSL Encrypted Payments
- ✔ Fast Global Delivery — 3–11 Business Days
- ✔ Easy Returns on Eligible Items
- ✔ 100% Money-Back Guarantee — Full Refund if Not Satisfied
AUTHENTICITY GUARANTEED
Reserved for you — complete your purchase to secure this piece.
OFFICIALLY AUTHORIZED RESELLER
Discover Officially Authorized Authentic Items at STORE7994.com - Certificates Available on Request!
Independently verified for store quality and customer safety.
Trust score: 91/100
All designer items offered by STORE 7994 are sourced from trusted luxury distributors and verified through independent authentication services.
Learn how STORE 7994 authenticates luxury items
Guaranteed Authentic — Includes Brand Documentation & Third-Party Verification Options.
Shipping information
- Free Shipping* on all orders over $300 USD to most countries* Estimated delivery: 2-5 business days Mon-Sat to U.S., CA, EU etc.
- Tracking available: DHL Express
- Store 7994 Shipping policy
- Global delivery in 3–9 business days (location dependent).
- Free Worldwide Shipping $300+. International duties & VAT are calculated by destination country and may be collected upon delivery. UK orders are subject to 20% import VAT upon delivery.

Our innovation isn’t just in the brands we carry — it’s in the way we connect them. From our automation engine that keeps collections globally updated to our commitment to authenticity-first presentation, STORE 7994 exists where timeless design meets modern precision.
Every product we offer is:
Elevated · Intentional · Exclusive · Authentic
STORE 7994 is an authorized reseller of luxury fashion houses. Certificates and proof of authenticity are available to brand owners and partners upon request.
Returns & Refunds
We want you to shop with confidence at STORE 7994. If your purchase does not meet expectations, eligible items may be returned under the conditions below.
Return Eligibility
Items must be unused, unworn, and in original condition with all tags, packaging, and accessories included. Items showing any signs of wear or damage will not be accepted.
Return Window
Return requests must be made within 14 days of delivery.
Return Shipping
Customers are responsible for return shipping costs unless the item is defective, damaged, or incorrect.
Luxury Items
Items valued over $1,000 may be subject to a 7% restocking fee upon approved return.
Non-Returnable Items
For hygiene and product integrity reasons, the following items are final sale once opened or used:
• Underwear
• Fragrances
• Any worn or used items
Made-to-Order Items
Custom-designed products, including STORE 7994 hoodies, are made exclusively for each customer and are final sale. These items are not eligible for return or exchange unless defective or incorrect.
If you receive a defective or incorrect item, please contact us and we will make it right.
International Shipping & Duties
Many of our products ship directly from trusted international partners. Any applicable customs duties or import taxes are calculated at checkout and are non-refundable, even if the item is returned.
Returns & Associated Fees
All approved returns are subject to a $24 return processing fee. For international orders, duties, taxes, and return fees will be deducted from the original payment.
Shipping Policy
Complimentary shipping is offered on orders over $300. Orders below this threshold are subject to standard shipping rates at checkout.