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by James Fell (Author)
SH!T HAPPENS. AGAIN.
That famous photo of the Loch Ness Monster was faked as an act of revenge against The Daily Mail. Before "Scotty" saved the starship Enterprise a bunch of times, future actor James Doohan stormed the beaches at Normandy to help save the world from Nazis and he got shot to sh!t. Originally known as "Napalm Girl," Phan Thi Kim Phúc survived, escaped to Canada, and now helps child victims of war. The first pride parade was inspired by the New York Stonewall Riots, when the LGBT community fought back against police oppression. When Trump lost the 2020 election, his lapdog lawyer Rudy Giuliani held a press conference at Four Seasons Landscaping, located between a crematorium and a porn store. In 17th-century Italy, when divorce was not at all a thing, hundreds of women married to abusive husbands employed Giulia Tofana to poison them. Iñupiat woman Ada Blackjack, and her cat, survived in the remote Arctic for two years when all the men on the expedition died ...
Sh!t goes down every single day of the year, year after year. Sometimes it's a battle that changes the course of history, other times it's a life-saving medical advancement. Bravery is counter-balanced with cowardice. Along with slavery, there is self-sacrifice. History is full of deeds both noble and despicable. Some were motivated by greed, others generosity. Many dedicated themselves to the art of killing, while others focused on curing. There have been grave mistakes and greatness, confrontation and cooperation.
Early in the twentieth century Spanish philosopher George Santayana wrote, "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." Yet history serves not just as warning, but encouragement. Humanity is not endless suck. There is inspiration to be found amidst the atrocities.
WHEN SH!T GOES DOWN, WE GET BACK UP.
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Our innovation isn’t just in the brands we carry — it’s in the way we connect them. From our automation engine that keeps collections globally updated to our commitment to authenticity-first presentation, STORE 7994 exists where timeless design meets modern precision.
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Returns & Refunds
We want you to shop with confidence at STORE 7994. If your purchase does not meet expectations, eligible items may be returned under the conditions below.
Return Eligibility
Items must be unused, unworn, and in original condition with all tags, packaging, and accessories included. Items showing any signs of wear or damage will not be accepted.
Return Window
Return requests must be made within 14 days of delivery.
Return Shipping
Customers are responsible for return shipping costs unless the item is defective, damaged, or incorrect.
Luxury Items
Items valued over $1,000 may be subject to a 7% restocking fee upon approved return.
Non-Returnable Items
For hygiene and product integrity reasons, the following items are final sale once opened or used:
• Underwear
• Fragrances
• Any worn or used items
Made-to-Order Items
Custom-designed products, including STORE 7994 hoodies, are made exclusively for each customer and are final sale. These items are not eligible for return or exchange unless defective or incorrect.
If you receive a defective or incorrect item, please contact us and we will make it right.
International Shipping & Duties
Many of our products ship directly from trusted international partners. Any applicable customs duties or import taxes are calculated at checkout and are non-refundable, even if the item is returned.
Returns & Associated Fees
All approved returns are subject to a $24 return processing fee. For international orders, duties, taxes, and return fees will be deducted from the original payment.
Shipping Policy
Complimentary shipping is offered on orders over $300. Orders below this threshold are subject to standard shipping rates at checkout.
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