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✔ Select Collector & Specialty Pieces May Require Secured Delivery Handling
by Dr Cheese (Author), Blain MC Clay (Author), J. Henry Lizard (Author)
Gag gift for a friend/Tongue in cheek ribald humor/Coffee table book.
Haiku are a style of poem originating in Japan and generally following a 5-7-5 syllable format.
Traditionally following seasonal or naturalistic themes, these ones are a little different.
Haikus for perverts started out as an exchange of joke between buddies. We were having so much fun with ourselves, we felt we needed to show them off to the whole world.
So we've put together this tidy package so you can get your grubby mitts on one yourself. Get yourself comfortable, spread the pages open and have a blast.
Try a quick dalliance by yourself, or maybe with friends. Startle your uptight neighbors who just can't help but sneak a peek in your window to see what all the noise is. Take a picture and send it to everyone on your contact list. Offend some you just met by bragging about it. Chat up a hottie at the bar and tell them how great it is in the hope they'll come home with you to check it out. Leave it hanging half way out of your pants on the subway. The possibilities go on and on.
Why, you could whip it out nearly anywhere. Probably shouldn't at a school though. That's generally frowned upon.
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AUTHENTICITY GUARANTEED
Reserved for you — complete your purchase to secure this piece.
OFFICIALLY AUTHORIZED RESELLER
Discover Officially Authorized Authentic Items at STORE7994.com - Certificates Available on Request!
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Trust score: 91/100
All designer items offered by STORE 7994 are sourced from trusted luxury distributors and verified through independent authentication services.
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Guaranteed Authentic — Includes Brand Documentation & Third-Party Verification Options.
Shipping information
- Free Shipping* on all orders over $300 USD to most countries* Estimated delivery: 2-5 business days Mon-Sat to U.S., CA, EU etc.
- Tracking available: DHL Express
- Store 7994 Shipping policy
- Global delivery in 3–9 business days (location dependent).
- Free Worldwide Shipping $300+. International duties & VAT are calculated by destination country and may be collected upon delivery. UK orders are subject to 20% import VAT upon delivery.
Our innovation isn’t just in the brands we carry — it’s in the way we connect them. From our automation engine that keeps collections globally updated to our commitment to authenticity-first presentation, STORE 7994 exists where timeless design meets modern precision.
Every product we offer is:
Elevated · Intentional · Exclusive · Authentic
STORE 7994 is an authorized reseller of luxury fashion houses. Certificates and proof of authenticity are available to brand owners and partners upon request.
Returns & Refunds
We want you to shop with confidence at STORE 7994. If your purchase does not meet expectations, eligible items may be returned under the conditions below.
Return Eligibility
Items must be unused, unworn, and in original condition with all tags, packaging, and accessories included. Items showing any signs of wear or damage will not be accepted.
Return Window
Return requests must be made within 14 days of delivery.
Return Shipping
Customers are responsible for return shipping costs unless the item is defective, damaged, or incorrect.
Luxury Items
Items valued over $1,000 may be subject to a 7% restocking fee upon approved return.
Non-Returnable Items
For hygiene and product integrity reasons, the following items are final sale once opened or used:
• Underwear
• Fragrances
• Any worn or used items
Made-to-Order Items
Custom-designed products, including STORE 7994 hoodies, are made exclusively for each customer and are final sale. These items are not eligible for return or exchange unless defective or incorrect.
If you receive a defective or incorrect item, please contact us and we will make it right.
International Shipping & Duties
Many of our products ship directly from trusted international partners. Any applicable customs duties or import taxes are calculated at checkout and are non-refundable, even if the item is returned.
Returns & Associated Fees
All approved returns are subject to a $24 return processing fee. For international orders, duties, taxes, and return fees will be deducted from the original payment.
Shipping Policy
Complimentary shipping is offered on orders over $300. Orders below this threshold are subject to standard shipping rates at checkout.
